The Beauty of True Friendship
Life was meant for good friends and great adventures...
The end of the year is naturally a time to reflect. We look back at the challenges we faced and overcame, as well as those that threw us off balance, with awe at making it through it all. We assess the relationships we have and appreciate those who never left our side. We spend more time with those who are dear and miss those we have lost along the way. We mourn our losses, critique our shortcomings, and plan better for the year ahead. As we plan and prepare for the coming year, we are always filled with so much hope and enthusiasm that everything will be much better than what we experienced this year. This reflecting exercise is always to look back so that the view looking forward is even clearer.
This December, I noticed a trend that seemed to have more people partaking in it beautifully, and I was nostalgic. In the last few days/weeks, social media was abuzz with various posts on Friendmas celebrations. From little intimate picnics to luxurious themed parties, this was a time where the beauty of friendship was in full display. Friends came together to celebrate and love on one another. The genuineness of these friendships is something entirely apart. While I may not have had a Friendmas celebration, despite my desire to partake in one, I do have very dear people whom I call friends, and I appreciate and love them so much.
Yesterday, as we were carrying on the Christmas tradition of wishing our loved ones and strangers alike a Merry Christmas, my best friend penned down a love letter for me. This was so heartfelt and it made me deeply emotional, considering how busy she must have been to find the time. I must have read it more than five times, and every time I do, I highly appreciate the time she took to put her thoughts and feelings into seven paragraphs just to let me know how much I mean to her. While I may have received messages from loved ones throughout my life, nothing has been more intentional and touching before. She has played such an integral part in my life throughout the years that she is undoubtedly the sister I never had. We have lost and found each other in the most profound way.
As introverts who happen to "know" a lot of people, we often get mistaken for having a lot of friends. God knows I don't go out of my way to make friends, and as such, I can count my true friends on one hand. Naturally, I repel people who misunderstand me, and I have always found comfort in knowing that my tribe will always find me because I am always my true self. This makes me appreciate the people who take their time to get to know and grow with me through all my flaws even more.
True friendship, to me, is the significance of the time spent throughout the friendship. The years may be many, and time may have been spent, but if there are no valuable lessons learned, memorable moments and experiences shared, growth and understanding, unconditional love, patience, and the appreciation of companionship from one another, that may very well be time wasted. I appreciate friends who consider my feelings when dealing with things that concern me, who are loyal to the sisterhood more than being egocentric and disloyal. Where one extends themselves for the benefit of others while expecting nothing in return. When you are a giver like me and are always willing to do more for others, it is even sweeter when that is reciprocated. Thoughtfulness, kindness, and genuine care are the prerequisites of any formidable relationship; those elements help weather any storms.
Friends are an extension of our families; they are the families we choose for ourselves. Knowing that you have chosen the right people whom you can trust with your life around you is the most satisfying feeling. As we grow older, we lose people who are not good for us or whose chapter in our lives has ended, and that is okay. We need to accept that the change in who we associate with is always inevitable as we grow older, and it does not mean we are bad people. Keeping the wrong people in our lives can be very detrimental, as there is so much at stake. Nothing should ever compel you to keep people who are not worthy of your trust, love, and time in your life. I believe in always knowing when to let someone go, as daunting and painful as this is, it is best done sooner rather than later.
My wish for the years we still have in this earth is that; may we all have true friends that we can grow old with, be able to share all our lows and highs without any fear of jealousy and animosity. May we have the wisdom to choose the right people and hold them dear. May we be blessed with longevity in friendships. May we all have Friendmas as well next year! 😊
I hope you are having the most wonderful time with your loved ones.